Learning lessons the hard way....

Today was not just an ordinary open water swim, it was a lesson on making sure you don't have blocked sinuses after having the flu. You see swimming out three kilometers was fine, once I turned and was heading back I could feel my stomach churning, and a feeling of being disorientated coming over me, I tried to keep going after stopping for a couple of times, but the feeling was so bad, that by the time I got to the beach, one kilometer from the starting point, I was starting to dry-retch. I managed to settle my breathing down and relax whilst walking back. We were lucky that the weather was lovely in the sun while walking which did help.

The positive out of a negative is that I have learnt to let myself recover from a cold, flu or sinus issues before heading back to the open water, I really don't want to feel like this again. So its back to the gym and stay on dry land for a little while longer. Though a pool swim might be needed on Wednesday morning for some technique work.

Have an awesome week everyone...

Hayley xx

Nine Months till Rottnest Channel Swim...

With nine months left till the Rottnest Channel Swim, I am starting to feel like everything is falling into place. I have managed to locate a local person with a boat and skippers ticket to be able to be part of our support crew. This is usually one of the biggest parts to the organisation of the event for swimmers. So fingers crossed tomorrow it will be confirmed and then just one more boat and skipper to find for my training partner.

I am enjoying the journey of training and organising all that we need to, to reach such an amazing event. I still get told that I am one crazy person for swimming in the ocean at the end of May, when the morning temperatures are about 8 degrees celcius, I don't think I have ever been open water swimming during this time of the year, I have to admit I am quite enjoying the new experience, as much as the water is cold, and I do wear a wetsuit to protect myself from the cold and also jellyfish stings, but come September the wetsuit is off and the acclimatisation to the elements is back on.

When it comes to preparing for such a large event, it is so important to believe in yourself, but also to believe in your journey and preparation that you put yourself through. I have come to find that there are certain times that you can loose sight of the end, but as long as you stay focused on the day and week at that point everything is good. Even if its a time of being sick or dealing with an injury, this is part of the journey. Its time to take stock and reassess where you are at and if you are still on track with the goal. Are there some changes that need to be made or added? This has taken me a long time to learn and so glad that I can enjoy this truly amazing time in my life.

 I saw this photo on Facebook the other day. This is the view I love so much when I am swimming, seeing what is ahead, below and above. Being able to swim in such an amazing ocean is magical.

On this note I will say goodnight and hope everyone has an amazing Saturday, and find an amazing view that takes your breath away just for a moment.

Hayley xx

2 sleeps and I am back in the water...the inner child.

Yep that is right, just 2 sleeps and I will be plunging back into the water after getting the flu last Friday. So a week and a half of no swimming, and no gym, so I am a little super excited to be able to get back into the salty waters of Cottelsoe Beach Sunday morning for a training swim. Yes I will be wearing my wet-suit as the days have cooled down considerably.

Its times like these where I get excited like a child on a warm summers day and their parents have promised to take them to he beach swimming and playing in the sand. I still believe as adults we should have moments of feeling excited like we did as kids. I have been sick this past week with the flu, and as I haven't done any training or swimming in that time, its that feeling when you know its only days away and the weather even though its going to be a bit chilly, the water is going to be calm, and sunny, what more could someone who loves swimming so much want.

 It was funny last night at work I was walking back through the arcade that our shop is in, and instead of just walking I trotted like a horse, it was great, just goofing around and enjoying the moment of being happy and feeling better after being unwell.

we get so caught up in raising our children, working, so called living our lives in the hustle and bustle of the world, and social media that we don't seem to take enough time to play like kids, or even if we do others will frown upon it. We as adults need to find the things in our lives that give us that happy, that kid like excitement again, and remember what its like to feel the deep feeling of excitement over even the smallest things, like for me being able to get back to the gym, or getting back into the ocean and swimming, even with the mornings being so cold.

It can some times stunt your happiness...

Have an awesome weekend....I know I will....

Re-Grounding...

With so much happening over the last few weeks, I have had to come to a complete stop, and reground myself. I get the feeling some times of floating away to far and fast, this is usually when so much is and has been happening in my life and round me. So I took some time to see my psychologist as I had a really bad week with my recovery process, and it allowed me time to just vent everything that was going on, in a place where I felt comfortable and safe. I wasn't really looking for answers to my issues, but just a place an someone to let them out to.

I also realised that its at times like this that I need to take some time to reground myself, re attach my feet to the earth and just quieten myself mentally.

Recently my daughter has been baking up a storm in my kitchen and making some amazing gluten free cupcakes, even gluten free and lactose free cupcakes.  We have also been out getting her some new baking ware to keep her going as she embarks on her pre apprenticeship course in July (your can find her at  http://getbakedcupcakes.blogspot.com). After seeing her so happy and having so much fun baking for everyone to taste her creations and believe me they are amazing, I took my turn in the kitchen last night. I made dinner for everyone and then made gluten free bacon and cheese muffins, it was great to make muffins and actually enjoy eating them. I need to make sure that during the week I take some time to just do something that takes me back to the basics and that I enjoy.

When we get so caught up in every day life and stresses, we need to remember what we can do that is simple but fun, just to break the monotony of our day and do that something that will put a smile on your face and keep that inner fire burning. Finding the things that rejuvenate us, is it being out in the sunshine hiking, baking in the kitchen with the music playing and dancing around at the same time, drawing, playing with your pets and even going picnicking with your family on a beautiful Spring, Autumn, or Summers day? Take the time to find these things out and enjoy the wonderful moments they bring to your life and the time you can just relax and reground yourself to the earth.

That stuck feeling...

That moment when you feel like your world is collapsing around you. Its been one of those weeks, I was right on the edge of an eating disorder relapse, which for me is not good. I got to a point on Friday while swimming and asked myself, why am I doing this? I had hit frustrations with people around me and feeling like I was drifting further and further into an area I didn't want to go back to.

I managed to catch myself in time through different situations in the last couple of days, to see that I was starting to spiral. So what happens from here. I take this week and take a step back and reassess my reasons for swimming, my health, my mind set, and then get myself back on track.

I have been given by the Universe a kick in the butt to say, "hey slow down, lets clear the mind and reset." This is something in the past I wouldn't have done, I would have just kept going, bottled all my emotions up and not put any thought to sorting them out.

So where to from here, keeping positive thoughts and taking some time away from the pool, and get some work done in the gym, and de-stress the muscles that get used so much in the pool. Spending time listening to my music, which is always a great way for me to clear my mind, and to think things through. Spend some needed time working on my book, and study.

Even the most positive people need to cocoon themselves and reset their minds and goals, and then spread their butterfly wings to reach new, and old goals and move forward.

Have an awesome week everyone...

Hayley xx

Believe in yourself....

Its been an awesome start to the week of training, with a recovery swim on Monday morning, then squad on Monday night, and being the only female in the squad at the moment, it was great to try and keep up with the guys, as they are faster and a lot taller than me, always good training with them. It was a great rest day yesterday and that means a lot, as I really don't like doing rest days, but I have come to learn how important they are.

Today was a great 2700m, done as reverse pyramids, which is a 200m warm up rest for 1 minute, then into 600m (50sec rest), 500m (40 sec), 400m (30 sec), 300 (20 sec), 200m (10 sec), 100m (10 sec), 4 x 50m (with 5 second rest between each 50m), cool down of 200m. This is a great swim when you are fatigued already and becomes a mind session, to keep going when you really just want to stop. So when it comes to swimming the Rottnest Channel, I can remember these kinds of sessions and know that even when I am sore and fatigued I have the ability to keep going.

I guess this can be used in everyday life, when you get to the point of feeling like something isn't going right, if you just keep plugging away it will happen. Even during the session this morning remembering why I was in the water and focusing on my stroke technique and breathing, to make sure I was efficient in the water was so important to help reduce the mental fatigue and physical. Everything in life is 90% mental and 10% physical, so it is so important, in my view to make sure you hold a positive attitude, and yes that is easier said that done, and I don't go into a negative at times, but I make sure I can move away from that negative and move to a more positive place in my everyday life, and swimming.

I have seen many a negative person, and the way they dwell on the bad things in their lives, and how that has a ripple affect around them, as others fall into the rippling water...Some people can pull themselves out of that negative hole, but others can't, and for me it is important to be able to walk away from negative people and situations and put myself in a better place.

Have an awesome day...

Hayley xx

It All Started With A Swim...

What a start to my day, I had the best swim at my favourite beach with a great training partner. We did 7.78 kilometers, and being able to do it in the open water at this time of year with great conditions was totally awesome! 

I came home to have my coffee and sit and relax, and then the song, It Started With A Kiss , by Hot Chocolate, came to mind and so I found the words and here they are for the chorus, and I just had to change a few words to make it suit my mood...I sit here now and laugh so much at what I have done...

It started with a SWIM

Never thought is would come to this.

It started with a SWIM

Never thought it would come to this.

You don't remember me

Do you? You don't remember me

Do you?

Walking down the BEACH came the star of my love story

And my heart began to beat so fast

So clear was my memory.

I heard my voice cry out YOUR name

And as THE WATER looked and looked away

I felt so hurt

I felt so small

And it was all that I could say

I can say that today is totally awesome and if I can have more days filled with such happiness I am super excited...so this is what swimming can do, or is it the brain being water logged?? Either way I want more!!!!

Have the best day everyone, and to all the mum's out there, have an awesome Aussie Mother's Day!!!

Hayley xx

With Recovery Comes More Changes....

Well its been a week of changes again. I have come to find that with recovering from an eating disorder no matter how far along the road of recovery you are on, things are put in front of you to try to and to see if you are strong enough to managed the issues and to maintain good eating habits.

I believe that when in recovery, I will probably be there for the rest of my life, as I had, had an eating disorder for about 30 years, I have habits that are so ingrain, that even though I have changed 99% of those eating disorder habits, it is easy when having a week like I have had, to revert back to restricting my eating, but I only did that for one day, instead of a week, like I used to.

I have thought about so many different things this week and, have managed to get a lot of my thoughts down on my phone as notes to work on for my book that is in progress.

I did get myself an interesting book at the start of the week on cognitive behavioral therapy for eating disorders. As an adult dealing with an eating disorder and recovery, I have had the best and worst sides of dealing with my recovery. I have been old enough to know better with what I was doing to myself with restricting my food, but so caught up so much in the eating disorder to not be able to stop, until I worked out what was triggering me to restrict and over exercise. During my recovery I became my own therapist, I found a way to work out my trigger(s) and to work this out I would write a certain word in a rectangle on a piece of paper and then descriptive words and short phrases around it but connected with lines. This was a very practical way to release built up emotions that I found hard to release, but could do it on paper. Even now when I have a week like I have had I can put pen to paper, or fingers to keys, and put my thoughts and feelings down, so I don't have to constantly carry them around and think over and over again and cause more problems which can cause relapses. This book is more of a technical book for therapists, but I feel that by reading it I will learn more ways of dealing with my own recovery and even maybe one day being able to help others.

Have a great weekend everyone...

Hayley xx

Photos of my Precious City...

I have a wonderful friend who has taken some amazing photos recently of the city I live in, and wanted to share them here with everyone...

 Perth City with the Swan River.

 From Mt Henry Bridge looking back to Perth City with the Swan River in view, I have ridden this path way many a time and never get tired of the view.

 Photo taken in South Perth